AsterControl.com - (News)
Fanworks: Fics: Tron: System Boundary
System Boundary
He notices it first, and too late, with Ram.
When the dying friend he didn't know was dying calls out softly, "come here," calls him over for one last touch. Hands meet. Eyes meet. A long moment, very long.
Flynn knows, in this exact position with anyone back home in the real world, they'd be about to kiss. And he so totally would kiss Ram... If he was sure. Absolutely sure.
He can't be absolutely sure of anything, with these programs. They respond like... like not quite people, even though they so totally are. Flynn watches for signs, unconsciously, always, with anyone. Signs to know when they're ready, ready for him to move in for a kiss or a touch or whatever the next step is. Ram has given nearly all the signs. Nearly. More close to all than Flynn's ever seen anyone give without crossing that boundary line.
But not all. He knows that. Even though he can't recognize the boundary, can't tell just what's missing... (He doesn't know how this works! It's unconscious!) But he's not going to move until he sees it, whatever it is, that tells him it's okay.
And nothing's okay. Because then Ram's gone, the chance lost. And from there on, Flynn just tries to survive and keep his thoughts off of that.
Until it happens the second time, with Tron.
Who Flynn seriously thought was about to kill him for a second there, glaring at him disguised in the enemy's stolen circuit-colors.
But no, the instant Tron realizes who he is, he's being pulled up onto the deck and holy god, those hands on him, those EYES on him-- there is so absolutely no WAY Tron isn't about to kiss him--
...But no, because Flynn's kissed and almost-kissed a lot of people, and by this point if Tron WERE about to kiss him he would've already.
Flynn knows that, because the rhythm of people is almost as instinctive to him as the rhythm of code. But Tron and Ram are something else, apparently. Not people or code, but a mix of both that Flynn doesn't know how to read. Giving so close to every possible sign that Flynn can't even tell what's missing. But he knows there's something. A boundary. Something missing, a gap Flynn's not comfortable stepping over.
So he just lets Tron cover him with the touches that Tron seems comfortable with right now-- one of which triggers a color shift, a correction of his light-lines, and he shades from the red disguise back to blue, with a split-second flash of sensation in the middle of violet that he cannot quite convince himself afterwards was even real.
And they break the hug and Tron asks "Where's Ram?" and Flynn says "Ram didn't make it" and watches the pain just barely start to blossom across Tron's face before it's caught, quarantined like a virus, packed away deep inside and then Tron's smiling again, all cheerful on the surface.
Oh yeah. Boundaries.
Tron's there with Yori, which, if they were human in a human society, might explain why Tron didn't kiss him, but Flynn has no idea how relationships work in this world and anyway it doesn't explain why Tron did practically every possible thing up to and not quite including kissing him.
And Yori is... polite with Flynn, and cautiously helpful... until the collision where they lose Tron.
Then she turns not just cold but almost-- Flynn's not sure how to say it-- almost gone. Like she's just done with the world, now that Tron isn't in it anymore. Like she's just waiting for everything else to end; has no energy left for caring.
He isn't surprised, when the moment comes when she suddenly just passes out. Isn't surprised, and also knows (like one more instinct he can't explain) how serious it is. And how to give her enough energy to bring her back.
Which she's angry at him for. Of course. He overstepped a boundary. He doesn't, can't, understand what she's going through, and boundaries are important (the ones between people, anyway, not the ones around corporations that he crosses all the time with no qualms). She has the right to be angry. He has no right to be angry back. Should he not have saved her? Was it right or wrong? Who knows. But he knows people enough to know the rights of anger.
And then they look down and see Tron fighting Sark, and there's the cascade of one response on top of another-- he's alive! look, Yori-- he's ALIVE! he's fighting! he's-- he needs to attack THERE, now, but he can't-- how can we--
The answer comes to Flynn in his usual way-- epiphany, sudden certainty. There's no boundary to worry about now except the boundaries of the MCP so he's not going to second-guess himself, he's just going to go with what he's unconsciously gotten as the sum of everything he just unconsciously added up. And trust that whatever that is makes sense. Because that's the way he's gotten through life so far.
He says he's going to jump, to distract the MCP. He knows it'll work, for that, at least. And he's got no idea what that's going to do to him, but he knows he has no rational reason to believe he'll still be alive at the end of it (though the unconscious equations being added up in his gut seem to think he'll be fine, but anyway that's not important, he's just one guy and this is a whole world of people, the most amazing world he's ever seen and dammit yes of COURSE he's going to save it, no matter what happens to him.)
And then... then it happens the third time. With Yori.
He says he'll jump, and she says "don't! you'll be derezzed!" and then all of a sudden she is giving EVERY sign, every last one, and meeting him at least halfway before he even realizes he's moving in for the kiss. Boundaries all dropped, open wide to him. Warm, electric, a taste like citrus. He doesn't know why she's doing this, why he's doing this, he can't make sense of it at all--
Until the taste of oranges opens something else-- a memory-- a mind-- Oh.
Their minds are kissing now too-- data transfer slipping freely between like the touch of tongues between their mouths, and...
Flashes of image, memory, and... he does understand.
Laser center.
Lora's workplace on one side. Yori's on the other.
Yori was the first program to see oranges. First to smell and taste them. She's been closer to crossing this border between worlds than anyone else before him, except maybe her own User.
And she's also the only program who knows... consciously knows and has thought about... this same feeling Flynn's struggling with-- once and twice today but not for this third time, no, not now, because Yori understands.
The feeling of holding someone you love... looking at them... longing, confused. A look he sees in Yori's memory dozens of times over, the face of Tron that he recognizes so well from that moment of his own. Wanting. Holding someone you care about... knowing there's SOMETHING you and that person both want to do to each other... but knowing there's something stopping you...
...you just can't-- figure-- out-- what.
Subconscious.
A boundary.
But sometimes a boundary's just a glitch in the system.
An error message, "that function is not permitted" when you know damn well it is.
Flynn fixes glitches.
And right now he's repairing one with his lips. Who the hell knows how this wild world created itself, but he knows it's gotta come from some mad mixture of the energies of people and machines just swirled together randomly... and if you swirl together any two things so different, there's gonna be clumps and bubbles and spaces where it just does not work, right away.
That's when you keep stirring.
And the dry bubble of "no kissing allowed" is broken up, creamed smooth, and the system tastes like rainbow swirls of ice-cream and cookie dough, now, all blending into the most delicious color he's ever tasted.
Data transfer from Flynn's mind to Yori's says "Give him a kiss for me," and "Give him this kiss, I know how badly you've wanted to," and "I wanted it too" and "Thank you for understanding" and "If Ram ever comes back give him the kiss for me too, or ask Tron to, or both, whatever he wants, please, he deserves it, I wish I'd known, I wish I could've done this for him too."
But when the kiss breaks, all that his mouth can say is "Don't worry."
-
*****
-END OF LINE-
*****
-
Fanworks: Fics: Tron: System Boundary
AsterControl.com - (News)