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there is, apparently, an old roman tradition where as a bride leaves her wedding ceremony with her newlywed husband, she chunks handfuls of nuts at all the suitors she rejected as she walks by them and i don’t know why i am so in love with this idea but i am

oh?? does it hurt? are you wishing this could have been you on my arm? does rejection sting??

it won’t sting as much as these pistachios i’m about to pelt your face with, loser

hahaha

I wonder… which modern tradition evolved from this?

The rice-throwing, or the bouquet-throwing? Or both?

I can imagine it divided at some point

“so, the rejected suitor who catches the most nuts doesn’t have to feel bad ‘cause he will be the next one to get married!

…Oh, you think it’s too much of a hassle to count the nuts to see who wins?

…Oh, and you’re upset that sometimes the nuts accidentally hit the other wedding guests?

…Fine. We’ll throw 2 things. A bouquet, which any of those losers still desperate for marriage can try and catch. And a shitton of rice, which is basically little tiny nuts, which will still hit everyone including my sad rejected admirers, but it won’t hurt as much. Satisfied now?”