A thing that’s been on my mind lately over the past few months… for some reason I’m thinking about it especially hard today.
The “stages of grief” you often hear about.
Are also stages of hope.
And which of those things they ultimately end up getting called, depends on whether the situation ultimately ends up being hopeless or not.
Example. Suppose that a doctor tells you that you have a fatal disease, and you only have a few months to live.
Denial stage:
You can’t believe this is true. So this is when you might go off and get a second opinion. (If the second opinion actually says you have something treatable, denial might be what saves your life.)
Anger stage:
You are angry and looking for someone to blame. This is when you might notice that the doctor has a history of racism or sexism, and you have not been offered a lifesaving treatment that other patients with the same diagnosis have gotten. So this may be when you call the doctor out on this prejudice, advocate for yourself, and demand to be offered the same option. (If this treatment actually turns out to be something that could help you, anger might be what saves your life.)
Bargaining stage:
You are looking for things you could do to escape the bad outcome. This is when you might research further possible treatments that the doctor hasn’t suggested, and ask for them to be tried. Or, if there is a known treatment that you just can’t afford, this may be when you fight to raise money for it. (And once again, if you do get a potentially helpful treatment out of this, bargaining might be what saves your life.)
Depression and acceptance, here, are the two stages of giving up on life.
And you’ll never know whether this is the unavoidable ending, unless you try some of the other stages first.
Not sure where I’m going with this. Just throwing it out here.