“so whenever you really need to blow your nose, you should always just clean out a lot of earwax from your ears instead.”

“…why. Why would that help.”

“because wax has more helpful uses around the house than mucus”

“what. Are you suggesting I use my earwax for household– wait, INSTEAD of blowing my nose? are you suggesting I TURN MY SNOT INTO EARWAX before excreting it??”

“Why not? Just take your urge to blow your nose, and channel that into earwax instead!”

“dude that… that doesn’t work, they’re whole different processes, mucus comes from my NOSE, earwax comes from my EARS, I can’t believe i have to explain this to you–”

“what’s the big deal? it’s all the same thing! It’s stuff building up inside you that you have to let out! Why not make the effort to let out in a more useful form? You could do it with pee and poop too”

“IS THAT WHERE YOU GOT THE WORDS THAT ARE COMING OUT OF YOUR MOUTH”