the author’s barely disguised personality disorder
Just literally had it click when I replied vocally to this post and said “you mean my autistic character who struggles with their parents’ expectations or my…autistic character who struggles with their parents’ expectations…or my autistic character who struggles with their parents’ expectations” I got about eight deep ladies and gentlemen. I am
Felt.
pretty much everything i write is about autistic experience in some way, but… if I’m limiting it to examples of “personality disorders,” then… gotta say it’s only my most self-indulgent Tron fanfic “A Lightcycle Built For Two”
(wherein i deal with the fact that i probably have some form of narcissistic personality disorder, but that there sure as hell is no benefit in getting diagnosed with that, so i decided my therapy is gonna be “create two blatant self-insert OCs with all of my messed-up issues between them, and ship them with each other”)
(just about the most narcissistic thing I could possibly do, lol. And it helped, and I’m very happy with how it turned out.)
(And, learning to accept the fact that something so self-indulgent isn’t gonna get a lot of engagement from other people, and learning to be happy with it just as a thing I did for me…. is also part of my therapy, as it turns out.)
(because one of the most self-destructive obsessions I have –probably connected to said theoretical personality disorder– is the craving for always more attention and validation from others, despite my difficulties with actually going out of my shell to interact with others… so. This is practice.)